Friday flowers (crafty edition - take II, the evolution)

I'm still playing with these. I added some succulents and mixed in some candles.

{succulents, candles, paper flowers}

I think we'd need to use clear glass cylinders instead of mason jars. The jars photograph well, but in real life the embossed writing obscures your view of the succulents. I'd also use something other than dirty gravel that I scraped out of the yard, in case you were wondering about that.

{succulents, candles, paper flowers}

I'd like to have taller candleholders that could fit actual votives instead of tealights, but we have about 200 of these already (leftover from my sister's wedding). I'm still trying to decide how likely it is that the candles will set the paper flowers on fire. (Probably likely, if the flowers are loose and people start playing with them. Potentially less likely, if I glue all the flowers in place.)

The succulents weren't chosen specifically - they're just pups (baby succulents!) that my mom had lying around, waiting to be planted. That's part of what makes the succulents do-able for us. My parents already have a huge native garden to pull from.

This prototyping part is fun. Figuring out how many square feet of space you need per person for different seating layouts? Decidedly less fun. But much more important. So we're doing that stuff too. 

Friday flowers (crafty edition)

At approximately 11:35 pm last Thursday, I got this image in my head of a carpet of paper flowers. But not tissue paper ones - they were flowers with heft, tinted with watercolors. Structural, if you will. And they could be clustered thickly, thus the carpet image, and they would be so easy to toss on tables as wedding centerpieces, without fear of wilting. I tried to explain this to D and he told me to go to sleep. So I did.

But the next evening ...

{paper flowers}

$5 worth of supplies + nearly 8 hours of hard labor. Totally do-able, right? D is still not completely sold - he is kind of attached to succulents, which are also easy to set out and unlikely to wilt and require far less time.

Still and all ....

{paper flowers}

I'm hoping that our current household wedding obsession will calm down once we have our design finalized. Otherwise, you guys might be in for several months of half started projects and wedding babble. We should never have opened these floodgates.

p.s. (mini wedding planning update)

We are still deep in the thickets of wedding planning, the NOT FUN part. We are keeping focused, spending inordinate amounts of time looking at venues and caterers and doing cost comparisons. I think we almost have a place nailed down (fingers crossed times one million) but I'm getting more and more desperate to start on the fun stuff. FONTS! STREAMERS! TISSUE PAPER! I'm totally sick of the logistics (and normally, I'm all about anything you can put in a spreadsheet).

So we're taking a tiny break. Apparently, you are supposed to have inspiration photos* to show people, so they know what you're thinking. We have none. We are wedding failures. So tonight, we have a six pack of Raging Bitch IPA,** two laptops and a mission. Will report back.



* Actually, we are supposed to create a "storyboard" and we had to look up what that meant. Because I was pretty sure that they wanted an actual storyboard - you know, frames that show what happens when. So we'd start with us setting up the site and then move on to getting ready and then show the aisle walk, etc. I was so confused, because I figured that was pretty standard and wouldn't require actual illustrations. And neither of us is great at drawing. Thank god for Google. Turns out a wedding storyboard is just another name for an inspiration board, which is those collages of pictures that you see on all the wedding blogs. Which makes more sense in the context of the request.

** HIGHLY RECOMMEND.

(Not) wedding planning

Have you all been thinking that I'm being super stealthy about wedding stuff, not discussing it on the blog and then secretly staying up until midnight hand crafting glittered disco balls?

Rest your minds - we've done absolutely nothing except spend one breakfast* meeting** starting a guest list and that was double duty because the more pressing purpose of the list was to get our Christmas cards mailed.

{planning, lists - from our breakfast meeting}

Oh, and I bought an outrageously expensive shrug.

We are so on top of this. Did I mention we're hoping to do it this summer?
 


* It is my firm belief that all major life discussions should be accompanied by breakfast, alcohol or both. Ideally, our entire wedding will be planned over various happy hours. Sadly, this means we can't make any progress right now because I'm having a post holiday penance week with no alcohol or carbs. Wedding planning will commence this weekend, unless we find something better to do.

** I like to call most of our discussions meetings, while D feels that is a little cold and businesslike. Since this is my blog, I'll continue to refer them as meetings regardless. Editorial privileges and whatnot.

The long, engaged weekend

Um, you guys are amazing. I'm incredibly overwhelmed and touched by your comments yesterday. Thank you all so much for sharing in the excitement, truly.

I honestly wasn't sure where to start with this - we didn't have a super traditional engagement situation and it was a little complicated. Do I start with that? Or with a schlocky story about us and how we met? Plus, do I want to take up prime crafting post time during the holiday season to babble about myself? Tough decisions.

But then I started my usual process of pulling photos from the weekend and found myself writing a little bit more than usual. So here is the story of the weekend, organically. Good enough for now.

The weekend was a bit of a blur. Shocking, I know.

I was lucky enough to be able to take Wednesday off and I spent the entire day cooking in my kitchen, quietly. It was wonderful, soul renewing, especially because it felt like the calm before the storm, a day alone before this big life change (spoiler alert - I already knew we were going to make the official announcement on Thanksgiving, so it wasn't a surprise). Also, I got my hair cut and realized I'd forgotten how very good an expensive hair cut can make you feel. I had to run to the store for garlic and wait in a long day-before-Thanksgiving line and I was all smile-y, chatting it up with other customers instead of groaning audibly. I allowed the roving wine expert to talk me into another bottle of champagne, flipping my hair ever so slightly. Note to self, haircuts are totally worth the expense.

{thanksgiving kitchen}

On Thanksgiving, we strapped the giant door to our car and drove, slowly, slowly, slowly down to Orange, afraid we might take flight if we went over the speed limit. Having never actually driven the speed limit on the 405, we were somewhat curious about how long it would take. Answer - not too terribly long, especially if you have a ring nestled in your bag and feel so anxious/excited that time is alternately speeding way up and then slowing way down. Disorienting, to say the least.

{thanksgiving apps}

At my parents' house, D set to work making the door into a table. I flurried around the kitchen, determined to get the meal on the table on time, to make everything perfect. I snapped at my mom, but just once and then I made myself some strong tea and told myself to get it together. We set out plates of appetizers, large garden roses, plopped into a vase because we ran out of time to arrange them. People began to arrive. I tried to chat through the lump in my throat. We set the table, heirloom lace and linens overlapping to cover the giant door, now table. Silver and grandma's china. Linen napkins. Mismatched chairs for twelve.

{beautiful turkey}

The turkey emerged early, eager to get started. My mom used Alton Brown's Good Eats method and I'm pretty sure that we'll never go hunting for another recipe again. Fast, beautiful, perfect. I had been terrified that the (23 lb) turkey might be late, holding up the whole show. I couldn't explain to her why I was worried, so she probably thought I was crazy, but she was nice about it, getting the turkey in the oven right on my time table.

People filled their plates. Champagne and cider were poured. Immediately before we raised our forks, D stood and made the announcement. (I slipped my ring on under the table as he spoke) Our mothers cried. I turned bright red, mostly unable to speak, people hugged us. Glasses were raised, the ring was examined, congratulations were given. Wanting everyone to know on the same day, we drove over to my stepsister's house for dessert, made the announcement to the family, all hung out on the couch for a few hours, recovering. We emerged into a perfect night - cold and crisp and absolutely clear, filled with stars.

And there is this - I was overwhelmed. I was supposed to be happy and excited, but it was all hidden beneath a layer of stress from having such a big day, from having what had previously been so private suddenly become so public. I needed to decompress, badly. I got a little teary, and not in a good way. I felt a little bit like a failure at being engaged, already. We went home and collapsed.

The next day, we woke up late and ate leftover sandwiches with a side of cranberry orange relish.

{thanksgiving friday}

I re-read Harry Potter, just for fun, while eating pie in bed. D didn't complain even though I probably left crumbs.

{pie, book}

We went to a really hard yoga class and sweated a lot (I wore my ring and it was fine). We drove up to the vineyard to pick up our wine club shipment. We tasted several cabernets and pretended to be wine experts. We ate cheese and crackers and it finally hit me - I was so happy, so excited, so calm.

{wine tasting, feet}

We sat in the chilly air for a long time, feeling like kids. Except better, because we were a little tipsy. We took lots of pictures, including the fist pump shared yesterday. And some less exciting ones, like this.

{engaged!}

We drove home and spent the rest of the weekend just the two of us, which is exactly what I needed. A little reminder that even though this is all public, it's still just us. We ate lots of leftovers and washed lots of dishes and felt different, somehow.

{glass, china}

It was lovely.

About the ring - it was my grandmother's, who gave me my middle name and who died shortly after I was born. It is from the 1930s and it is a little bit art deco and sparkly and worn nearly paper thin in the back because she wore it her entire adult life. D and I both agree that we couldn't have picked something better, and I'm honored to have it. We had it painstakingly repaired but held off on replacing the band because I couldn't bear to do it right away. I love it.

About the wedding - I am really excited about being married, but a little freaked out by the whole wedding planning thing. This will probably pop up here and there on the blog, but I'm not planning on turning this entire blog into wedding planning central. We'll see how it goes. You'll probably also have to put up with some of my musings on how I came to the point where I wanted to get married, after having been in love with the same person for most of my life and feeling no desire to formalize it. Good thing you guys are patient.

Biggie

Kids, we're doing this thing ...

{engaged!}

Also, I got a really awesome new haircut.

Still processing everything, back tomorrow ...

Modern Wedding Invitation

Erin Jang works her magic again by designing this most adorable modern wedding invitation. The combo of houndstooth, polka dots, and stripes are knocking my socks off. Erin you just rock.

Wedzu

The Wedzu website launched today which is a brand-new online marketplace that is all about indie and handmade wedding goods. There is some great stuff -- have a looksy.

Tying the Knot

I'm a total sucker for a good wedding invitation so it shouldn't come as a surprise that I was completely floored by this invite by urbanINFLUENCE (a local fave of mine). Designed for art director Mike Mate's wedding, they are utterly charming. I love the summer camp feel and the gmund paper was the perfect choice. (If you'd like to see more uses of faux bois paper, I printed my husband's 30th Birthday invites on it). Congratulations to the newlyweds!




Guest Post by Kathleen from Twig & Thistle

Charming Wedding

This British wedding I saw over at 100 layer cake for Artemis and Nao is one of the most charming and well-done DIY weddings I've seen in quite some time. They made their wedding invitations, wedding attire, wedding jewelry (they have a vintage + jewelry shop) and much, much more! What a tone of work, but wow, look how lovely it turned out. Check out the rest of the photos over at tales of a junkaholic. They also even had a wedding tent which they got ready in and even stayed in afterwards too -- it was right on the edge of a cliff overlooking the water. Talk about a splendid event.




(photos from Junkaholic + bus photo by Kasia Kosaka)

The dark side of DIY

If the spreadsheet yesterday wasn't enough to clue you in, I'm an organized person.  I actually create a Thanksgiving information packet for myself every year with lists of recipes, multiple grocery lists, do ahead and day of task lists and an oven schedule in which every dish is assigned a specific time slot. I love this stuff. I wasn't corralled into planning R's wedding for her, I happily volunteered and I was thrilled that she was willing to let me help. We come from a family that entertains a lot, so it didn't sound totally crazy to go DIY. Basically, we were as well prepared for this as any regular people could be.

That said, we underestimated the work that goes into a wedding. Neither of us had ever done more than simply attend weddings. A wedding is huge. It is 100+ people and a ceremony* where you have to express your undying commitment to each other and a party where you have to make sure that people are comfortable and fed and watered and hopefully also enjoying themselves and you have to make sure people know where to be when and what they should wear.  And it isn't just supposed to be a good party, it's supposed to somehow transcend all normal parties and become magical.

I think the wedding was lovely. It made my sister happy, I'm proud of it, I blather on about it way too often for something that happened almost three years ago (!) and my sister and I had fun together scheming over it. You can see all that in the recaps (overview, invitations, dessert buffet, cake making). But it was rough at times (and it was about as simple as a wedding can get, unless you're just going to the courthouse), and I have learned valuable life lessons about delegating and letting things go and biting off more than you can chew without choking and/or getting tipsy on your first glass of champagne because you forgot to eat for a few days running. I'm grateful for this, truly. Otherwise I would undoubtedly have been forced to learn these lessons while planning my own wedding, and it would have been a huge bummer. So really, this was the best of all possible worlds - I learned that I'm crazy and overly ambitious and my sister got a free, if somewhat bossy and unprofessional, wedding planner.

I looked over the last month of planning schedule that I'd drawn up and just starting jotting down memories as they occurred to me. This won't be a super intelligent summary of dos and don'ts but the rambling stream of consciousness will give you a better idea of how those last few days went anyways. Please note that I did experience frustration with friends and family during this process and for the sake of being honest I admit it in some places below. Sorry, guys. I love you tons. You already know that I'm impatient and easily frustrated so you probably won't be surprised.

:: We ditched the programs altogether and no one seemed to notice. No big deal. People will love your programs if you make them and if you don't, they probably won't notice and they will be able to figure out what's going on, I promise you.

:: I end up taking Wednesday - Friday off work to finish stuff up. I pick up the flowers from the wholesaler on Wednesday morning and that goes smoothly. I feel very optimistic. I have a car completely full of hydrangeas and there is no traffic on the 405 and this combination makes me feel uncharacteristically whimsical. What could possibly go wrong?

:: Wednesday afternoon - I realize that the cake pans we thought we had for the wedding cake weren't what we needed so I waste valuable time running around to stores to get last minute stuff. Also, we need specific color dyes for the cake, according to Martha. And cake boards. And dowels. We have to go to a cake store because regular crafty stores don't even have all this stuff. Why was this not all purchased earlier? Oh, right. Because my mom was chained to the sewing machine making the flower girls' skirts and ties for the men and a sash for my dress. I (wisely) resist the urge to yell at her (partly because I actually enjoy the cake store quite a bit and we had fun) even though it was technically on her list (I think). Sorry, Mom.

:: My sister realizes she doesn't have shoes, so we go to a couple stores trying to find a good pair. Note that by "we" I mean my mom and I, because my sister has just started a new job and can't take any vacation days leading up to the wedding. Luckily my mom has the same size feet as my sister and I have the same taste in shoes. Between the two of us, we work it out. I resist the urge to call up my sister and yell at her for not picking out shoes earlier. Even though I know she's been incredibly busy settling into her new job and dealing with more important wedding stuff like the ceremony. Sorry, Sis.

:: No one has made playlists for the reception music. I tell them I don't care because it wasn't on my list of tasks. Figure it out or have a music-less reception or just put the iPod on random. I don't even have to resist the urge to yell at people because at this point I. Don't. Care. They get the message. The best man takes over.

:: We have the rehearsal on Thursday. The lady at the chapel warns us that locking our knees while standing during the ceremony can cause you to pass out. I start having mild panic attacks, picturing myself passing out in front of over a hundred people. This could have been left unsaid, I think. Unless you are having a full mass, there really isn't enough time to pass out.

:: Rehearsal dinner was at the local pizza place with pitchers of beer. Best idea ever (my sister's, naturally). We go out for a joint bachelor/bachelorette bar hopping expedition afterward, but I bow out after two drinks, consumed with visions of uncompleted tasks.

:: All the rental stuff is delivered on Friday morning and I have to be there to supervise and sign off. It takes longer than I expected. I have to convince the delivery guys to take the stuff through to the backyard (clearly stated in the contract) instead of dumping everything in the driveway and abandoning me.

:: I spend Friday baking cake layers, a bit frantically, when I was scheduled to be leisurely frosting the wedding cake. I am so distracted that I accidentally forget to add the cream cheese to some of the batches of batter. Only realize it when I notice that I have several bricks of unused cream cheese. Still tasted okay, luckily. There was no way I am remaking anything at this point.

:: We have girlfriends over on Friday night to help us arrange the flowers while we all eat pizza and talk. They are amazing and I think this was the best part of the preparation.

:: We set up the backyard on Saturday morning and it was a bigger hassle than I expected. Helpers need to be told what to do, preferably with a scale diagram with exact measurements of chair spacing. People expect me to know EVERYTHING and I start to get a little snappy. All the serving pieces for the dessert buffet need to be put in place and non-chilled stuff gets put out. Loads and loads of ice need to be procured for drinks. Cookies have to be unpacked and arranged. I call my sister and tell her there's no way I'm going to make it to the hair appointment she scheduled for me. Sad.

:: D comes down to help (he'd been in school, and couldn't get out earlier) and as soon as I get in his car I start bawling and CAN'T stop. Physically unable to stop. I give myself a full 10 minutes to cry it out (this is a epic sob fest for me, as I almost never tear up) and then pull it back together.

:: I end up frosting the cake less than an hour before the wedding, stressed in a major way. You guys, it was a huge cake. With a lot of frosting. We were supposed to have shaved fresh coconut flakes and things to decorate the cake. Eff that. My mom helped with the frosting while my stepdad cut dowels to order. Team work. We slap a bunch of leftover flowers on it, only later learning that hydrangeas are toxic. Spoiler alert - no one dies.

:: Fifteen minutes to go time. I manage to shower, finally. We somehow lose the blow dryer and I have a total freakout, but we borrow one from the neighbor and I recover, more or less. (Luckily my sister was getting her hair done at a salon, so she wasn't exposed to the craziness). I may or may not have yelled at several undeserving people at this point. I don't remember.

:: Ceremony is lovely, no one passes out. Reception goes smoothly and we go through massive amounts of champagne. I am a champagne pouring machine, which gives me a chance to talk to everyone and also ensures that they are slightly loopy for my speech. People chat and catch up. I don't blow my (unscripted) maid of honor speech. Cake is cut and served and only one person gets a dowel in his slice. It's our grandfather. He can deal with it. Dancing commences.

:: Bride and groom make their retreat, guests trickle out, family and friends help us break down all the tables and chairs and bag up the tablecloths and scrape and box up all the plates and glassware. This takes a while. I break down the dessert buffet and pawn leftovers off on guests. Give the toss bouquet to my favorite cousin because we forgot about until after my sister was gone. Wouldn't be surprised to find out my feet are actually bleeding at this point but I'm pretty sure they are surgically welded to my heels and I'm anesthetized by champagne and exhaustion.

:: D removes me and we drive through In'N'Out and I attempt to eat everything on the menu before falling asleep in the car.

This is what I try to remind people of every time they mention DIY wedding stuff. It's fun (if you already love projects - this is key), it gives you some flexibility, it can save money. But the bottom line is that there is a reason why people hire professionals and pay them scads of money. It is a LOT of work and there isn't any way of getting around it. I enjoyed it, because I'm the type of crazy person who genuinely loves planning stuff, but I still felt out of my league at some points.

In short ...

Edit your projects
Pick your battles
Remember that every fun little detail you add has to get packed up, carried in and later packed up and carried out
Pad every single time estimate you make by about 25%
An excellent day of (or site) coordinator could be a lifesaver


* I had absolutely nothing to do with the ceremony other than being told when to show up and where to stand. So anyone looking for pointers on writing your own ceremony will have to look elsewhere.

The cookie spreadsheet, explained

Last week's frozen cookie dough post forced me to get going on something I've been procrastinating on for a loooong time. I've had lots of requests for the cookie spreadsheet I used while I was planning the wedding cookie buffet for my sister's wedding, and I'm terrible at getting back to everyone individually (and not always on a computer with the file). Sorry to everyone who thinks I'm ignoring them. This is for you! I'm honestly not sure how often anyone finds themselves in a position where they need to make this many cookies (Christmas, maybe? If you're really intense?), but it will help if you're trying to tackle a huge baking project.

And while I was figuring out how to explain the spreadsheet to you and clicking back and forth between the pages, I found the little last month of planning schedule that I'd drawn up for us so that everything would run perfectly smoothly. I looked at it and laughed hysterically for a minute and then decided to share some of my (less pretty) DIY wedding reflections with you, a few years later. That part is coming tomorrow.

For the uninitiated (people who have not been reading for long enough that you are horribly sick of hearing about this wedding already) there are a series of posts about my sister's family made wedding here (overview, invitations, dessert buffet, cake making).

Back to the spreadsheet - I've uploaded it to my Google docs, so you should all be able to view it here. I've tried to set it up so that you can't edit it, but you can download it in Excel format and play with it on your own computer. If you have trouble, let me know in the comments and I'll try to troubleshoot.

Keep in mind that it's going to take a lot of adaptation unless you want to make exactly the same cookies in exactly the same quantities that I did. I made this for myself, so it isn't foolproof at all, and it will work best if you're already very comfortable with Excel. Here's a brief rundown on how I used it ...

The first page is the master list of recipes. It includes all the recipes I decided to use and how many batches I needed. There is a little check off section so that I could check off batches of dough as I went along, to keep myself organized. There are notes about whether the cookies were to be frozen as dough or as baked cookies. You'll have to enter your own information here.

The second page is the master list of ingredients. I tried to include most of the common ingredients so I would know what to buy in bulk. I looked up rough cup to weight conversions for the dried goods, and they probably aren't exact but I didn't end up way over or under. In order to calculate the totals, you have to tell Excel where to find the values. We'll get to that.

The third and fourth pages are the broken down recipes. For each recipe, you'll need to enter the ingredients and the amounts in the correct columns. The spreadsheet will automatically calculate your scaled up amounts if you enter the number of batches you want to make. To figure out how many cookies you're getting, change the formula in the box that says "total" by substituting your number of cookies per batch for whatever number I have in there. Excel will automatically multiply it by the number of batches you've entered.

In general, I made four batches of each cookie by making two double batches. This saved the most work. Make them one after the other and you won't even have to wash the mixing bowl between batches, most of the time. I automatically had Excel calculate the amounts needed for the double batch, because I found this helpful.

Now the fun part - pulling it all together to get your shopping list. I won't lie, this part can be tedious and it's easy to make mistakes. You'll have to do it yourself because all the cells are going to be moved around once you sub your own recipes in for mine. Let's say you're trying to figure out how much flour you need. You go to the second tab (master list ingredients) and select the cell between "flour" and "cups". Delete whatever is there, because it's my information. Type an " = " sign so that Excel knows you're going to enter an equation. Then click over to the tab with your recipes and select the cell from the first recipe with the total amount of flour for that recipe (you're looking at the "extended" column). Once you've selected the cell, enter a " + " sign and then click on the flour cell for the next recipe. When you've selected all the flour cells, hit enter. You should automatically be taken back to the master list ingredients tab and the total amount of flour needed will show up.

Excel is picky and it can be annoying when you aren't used to it. I don't recommend this spreadsheet to beginners, but if you have some experience I think you'll find it's significantly faster than trying to manually figure out all these totals.

I left my random bits and pieces of information in here as well. If you're curious to see how the last month-ish  of wedding planning went, you can click over to the last tab and see my calendar. I work full time, so I packed in all the major activities on Saturdays. I had goals for each week (you can see them in one long cell that underlines the week in question), and this was stuff that I had to do during the evenings. I started baking on the first of October, to give myself a full month. I aimed to spend about three evenings a week baking or mixing dough, getting two - three recipes done each week. It actually wasn't that bad. Once you have it all laid out, there aren't any decisions to make. You just plug along until you finish the checklist. When you're making double batches of dough, it all goes relatively quickly. The cookie part of this went exactly as planned, but the last week of wedding prep was a killer, for everything except the cookies. More on that tomorrow.

Charming Wedding

I can't get enough of the lovely wedding photos by Kamp Photography for Jessie and Tyler's charming wedding. The bride and groom are both graphic designers and the details of the event are delightfully well done.

I love the letterpress balloon wedding invitation created by the couple -- and those jam jars for favors are so precious! See more of the details of their sweet invite over at their website One Plus One and more photos over at Kamp Photography.




(all photos by Kamp Photography)

On being a wedding guest

With summer approaching, most of us have a few weddings to attend and wedding etiquette can be tricky. People who are about to get married tend to get a crash course in it, but the rest of us remain fairly clueless and happily oblivious of any rules we might be breaking. These aren't official wedding rules, just basic advice gleaned over time. If I'm horribly in the wrong about any of it, feel free to disagree in the comments.

{one of my favorite weddings - my dad and stepmom got married in their backyard a few years ago and had a potluck reception that was absolutely perfect}

Ahead of time:

1. RSVP. On time. Without making the couple hunt you down on the phone. They're not obsessive - they  need to know exactly how many people they'll be feeding.

2. Order a gift or send a card. Technically, you have an entire year to handle the gift situation. Personally, I feel awkward attending a wedding when I know I haven't taken care of it. If you have unerring taste and you know the couple well, buy them whatever you think is appropriate. I actually love ordering from the registry, so I always go that route. Sometimes I even place the order while I'm getting dressed for the wedding, because that's when I think of it. Oddly enough, best etiquette is to send the gift in the mail (easy with online registries). It was years before I realized this and now I understand it, because as a bridesmaid I've spent a fair amount of time schlepping gift boxes around (from the ceremony site to the reception site, from the reception site to someone's car who is later willing to deliver it to the couple). Not to say that the couple won't be thrilled to receive your gift however it arrives, just that logistically it's actually easier if it comes by mail.

3. Book a hotel room, if one is required.  Usually the couple picks a convenient hotel and reserves a block of rooms at a discounted rate (if they do, it's probably noted in the invitation). You still need to call and reserve a room. Just mention the names for the discount. You can also choose to stay at a different hotel if it's easier/cheaper for you. This isn't offensive. 

4. Figure out what you're wearing. This is mostly just for you, because no one really cares what you're wearing (or so I like to tell myself). Maybe it's a byproduct of living in California, but I swear that almost every wedding I've attended has had a vast range of clothing choices. There is ALWAYS some guy that shows up in shorts. Weird, right? As long as you are not the guy who shows up in shorts, and you don't wear white (theoretically a mortal offense to the bride, although I've never had this confirmed) then you're good to go, at least in my opinion.

Day of: 

1. Show up. On time. Enough said.

2. Be appreciative. My pet peeve at weddings is when guests complain about anything. The couple cared enough about you to invite you to their wedding. I don't care if you don't like their drink choices or their linen selection or if you are offended by a cash bar or if you think it's tacky that they're doing a money dance. I went to a wedding once and sat at a table with guests who complained because there was only one water pitcher on each table (apparently you are supposed to have two?) and they felt the wedding colors would have been more appropriate for a fall wedding (seriously). I nearly screamed. Be grateful that you're there sharing the day. Realize that they are many reasons why people make wedding decisions and it's easy to take pot shots when you haven't spent the last seven months dealing with it. If you must dissect the wedding choices (yes, I admit I am not a saint) do it in absolute privacy on the car ride home.

3. Have fun. I love weddings (absolutely all weddings, across the entire range of the spectrum - I've literally never been to a wedding I didn't enjoy), so this is easy for me. If the music is super cheesy, take advantage of it and dance. Talk to people and catch up and don't expect to see much of the couple, because everyone wants to see them and they probably haven't even had a chance to eat.

4. Carry a bit of cash. Valet tips, bartender tips, cash bar - you'll frequently encounter at least one of these things.

It's also worth noting that you are an adult and you have a choice. If you don't want to go for some reason, don't go. Send your regrets and don't stress about it. I think most couples would rather have someone not attend than be there reluctantly (because reluctant people are a bummer).

Rifle Custom Invitation

Uh-mazing! Did you see the invitation that Anna from Rifle custom made? The idea of embroidering and making them handmade then printing them is pure genius.

Greenhouse Picnic Wedding

Did you see the stunning photos that Chelsea posted on Frolic and Project Wedding? They are breathtaking and the greenhouse theme and styling is perfection. See more images and all of the images credits here.

(photos by Lisa Warninger)

Eunice + Daniel's Wedding

Have you seen the stunning details of Eunice and Daniel's wedding in Martha Stewart Weddings? Eunice is the creative director and co-owner/founder of the specialty letterpress design studio Hello! Lucky -- one of my lovely sponsors, doesn't their day looks so magical! You'll want to peek at more photos at Martha Stewart and Hello Lucky, because there are many more details to see.

I love what Brooke had to say about the event, and also the tidbit of advice she shared of how Eunice & Sabrina's father would read them chapter books each night, like Treasure Island. Doesn't the wedding look like it is out of a inviting and captivating storybook?

(photos by Gia Canali & Sara Remington)

Eat Cake Be Merry

A little while back, I received an email from Liz who started a new custom cake business called Eat Cake Be Merry. Check out these and other beautiful cake creations at their website, so pretty.

Week 44

Here are a few things that caught my eye this 44th week of the year.

1: Nicole's wedding photos
2: Work by Annalise Rees (via Noteworthy)
3: Work by Francois Robert (via Seesaw)
4: Bunting 101 by Jordan
5: Anniversary gifts from Design Sponge

Beautiful Real Wedding

I adore the wedding details from this real wedding of Chris + Cory seen over at Once Wed.

(photography by Kate Murphy)